Winters' Thaw Read online

  She focused on each glorious inch pressed deep and throbbing inside her, every pulse creating a lightning bolt that shot straight to her recently awakened and already greedy clit.

  Oh sweet heaven, she couldn’t—

  She could. With his first thrust her entire body locked and burst forward with the power of a roller coaster ride. The last thing she saw was the look of sheer pleasure on Kevin’s face as he lurched into the freefall with her, groaning her name. His thrusts found a rhythm, deep surges that buffeted her again and again, the movements of a man not completely in control. Every time she found release the pressure would build again and every time she clenched his cock, his thrusts grew harder and deeper.

  She knew the second he came. His cock grew and pulsed and he cried out but it was more than that. Right before he came something nonphysical picked her up and plunged her headlong into the vortex with him. For a few brief seconds she felt the tingle in his spine, the enveloping heat of her body, his overwhelming desire to feel her soft skin against him.

  The fireball explosion that followed was so intense she almost didn’t hear his astonished gasp, wouldn’t have known he felt the same awareness of what was happening to her both inside and out.

  When they slowed to a crawl, he was the one looking at her with shock. “What the fuck was that?”

  Not the most romantic thing to say but it was perfect. She knew exactly what he meant. She’d heard about this kind of connection with a lover but had seriously doubted its existence. She’d literally laughed at the description so often used in books about not knowing where one person ended and the other began.

  It was real. Not only had she experienced it but her lover had too.

  She’d taken the challenge and aced it. Great. But more than that, she’d accomplished the underlying goal for accepting the challenge in the first place.

  Any and all doubts about her sexuality were forever silenced.

  The feelings coursing through her were overwhelming but she didn’t realize she was crying until she watched Kevin’s expression turn to panic.

  Shit. Kevin slowly pulled his cock free and started to climb off the bed to take care of the condom. He never knew what to say or do when it came to waterworks and it was a damn uncomfortable feeling.

  “Hey,” Elle stopped him before his feet hit the floor. “Why are you so freaked out?”

  “Me?” He turned back to look at her. “I’m not the one crying.”

  “I wouldn’t be a jerk about it if you were. That was physically and emotionally earth-shattering and I can cry about it if I want to.”

  Damn. She was right on both counts. He’d never felt anything like that in his life and he was being a jerk. He took a deep breath and slowly released it. “Okay,” he said softly, then repeated it before leaning over to wipe one of her tears with his thumb.

  He kissed her, then kissed her some more until he wasn’t sure how much time passed but the tears had stopped.

  “I’ll be right back,” he told her.

  She nodded and he grabbed one more kiss before going into the bathroom. He knew she couldn’t see him from her angle on the bed so he took a good hard look at himself in the mirror after turfing the condom.

  He looked the same way he felt. Satisfied and…happy.

  The satisfied part was easy to pin and he supposed he could say the great sex made him happy too. The guy in the mirror wasn’t fooled.

  The happiness was being with Elle. He could see himself falling in love with her. Hell, no joke, he was more than halfway there.

  Even her drama was undramatic, yet he wasn’t anywhere near bored. She kept him on his toes and as hard as a rock. He’d come three times tonight and it wouldn’t take much on her part to get him going again. God willing he would make it last longer this time.

  He wondered if she was sore from the pounding he’d given her. She’d been right there with him though, literally in his head. Instead of freaking him out, he wanted more.

  Taking a little extra time in the bathroom to really think about getting involved with her didn’t change his mind. He wanted to see how far this thing between them could go. It wasn’t just the sex, though fuckin’ A, that would do it. He really liked being with her.

  It wasn’t a proud moment to realize he’d had relationships based on far less.

  He knew what he wanted. Now it was up to Elle.

  Elizabeth had to work hard to keep her shock from showing. Kevin had come back from the bathroom with a warm wet washcloth and he’d insisted on using it to clean her up. It was more than that though. He was so gentle, so loving that she felt something she’d never felt in sexual terms. Cherished.

  In an evening full of firsts, this one was right up there with the orgasms.

  When he was done, he turned her on her side and told her not to move while he returned the washcloth to the bathroom. Then he climbed into the bed and drew her back against him.

  “Comfy?” he asked.

  Their heads shared a pillow, so she nodded. Despite her history with Phil, a history Kevin was about to know, she wasn’t alarmed. She knew what was coming. Kevin pulled them into this spooning position on purpose, to offer her comfort and make it easier for her to talk.

  It amazed her that she already knew him so well.

  She must have made some sort of noise. He smoothed her hair behind her ear and traced the shell with his finger. “What?”

  “I feel like I know you. I mean, better than I should at this point,” she admitted.

  “You do. I’ve told you things I haven’t talked about in years. I want you to trust me like that too.”

  “It really does seem ridiculous now. It’s nowhere near as devastating as what you told me.”

  “Why don’t you let me be the judge of that? I’m assuming it was your ex. Was it something he said? Did?”

  “Both.” She paused, letting the warmth and strength from his body, of him, envelop her. “It was a culmination of stuff but a couple of things really stuck. Sex was never great. You asked me if a lover had ever brought me to orgasm with his mouth. The truth is, tonight was my first orgasm not by my own hand.”

  “Really? Wow.”

  “Pretty pathetic, huh?” she asked.

  “No. Sad, yes. You were married for a long time, right?”

  She nodded again. “Over twenty years. The one guy I was with before my marriage wasn’t much different. I just figured I wasn’t a sensual person and let it go at that. You can’t miss what you never had. I was raising two kids, working and running a household. Who the hell had time for sex and like I said, I didn’t exactly miss it. Bottom line, I didn’t care.”

  “So what changed? What finally ended the marriage?”

  She turned to face him. “Kevin, no offense but why in the world would you want to hear this crap?”

  He shrugged. “It’s part of what makes you tick and I like you. Your marriage shaped your life for over twenty years just like my tattoo shaped mine for over a decade.”

  He had a point there and it was kind of nice snuggled up with him like this. What had the cougars called it? Post-coital bliss with the cub. “Okay but the thing is there’s not much more to tell. He didn’t miss sex and instead of working on it together it became all about what I could do for him.”

  “Ahh.”

  That was the only sound he made but she knew Kevin was thinking about the blowjob she’d delivered. She couldn’t let him think she’d felt obligated. “I meant what I said before. Doing that with you was a victory. It was on my terms and the first time I truly enjoyed it. I hope you’ll let me do it again sometime.”

  His soft green eyes sparkled. “No worries there, believe me. And now that you mention it, I’d like for there to be an again. For all of it.”

  “No worries there either.” Like she was going to turn that down!

  “One more question.” He reached up and brushed several strands of hair behind her ear. “What brought you here to this point with me and why were you so
hesitant?”

  “That’s two questions. It’ll cost you one in return.” At his nod, she summed it up for him. “It wasn’t until after the divorce that I had time to wonder if I was missing out on something good. I tried to date but Phil’s hurtful comments over the years bubbled to the surface. The same thing happened a couple of times tonight but it was like it was automatic. I didn’t feel hesitant in my gut.”

  He’d asked for the truth and even though she’d tried to soften it, there was disappointment in his eyes.

  “You told me the night we met that you don’t date,” he admitted. “That part of it makes more sense now. You thought if you went through with having sex somewhat anonymously, you’d at least know if the stuff your ex said was true or not.”

  She nodded. “I wanted to make sure I didn’t mislead you. I told you exactly what I was looking for.”

  He didn’t say anything for a minute. “Do you still feel that way?” he finally asked. “I know we haven’t known each other long but I could really fall for you.”

  Her heart thudded hard against her rib cage. “Me too. This is crazy. We haven’t even been on a real date yet.”

  That made his eyes twinkle in the way she was starting to crave. “Best non-date I’ve ever had.”

  “I mean it,” she insisted. “You’re talking about taking it to the next level and there are so many factors to think about.”

  “Like what?”

  “Our age difference, for one thing.”

  He shook his head. “Not an issue for me. Even if it doesn’t work out between us, I’m done with younger women. I can’t take the drama.”

  There were plenty of younger mature women but she’d be a fool to point that out. “I’m not just older, I’m beyond important milestones. You should know I’ve had my tubes tied.”

  His brows shot up and Elizabeth braced herself. Been there, done that, blessed with two beautiful girls for the effort. God love the women who had the energy to do it all over again at her age or older. She was not one of them.

  But Kevin once again surprised her.

  “Fuckin’ A, we don’t need a condom?”

  Kevin had one hard and fast rule about sex. Always use a condom. At that moment he wanted nothing more than to slide into Elle’s sweet pussy without one.

  He eased her to her back and came over her on his forearms, so intent on his mission it almost didn’t register when she flattened her palms to his chest.

  “I appreciate the enthusiasm,” she gave him a rueful smile, “but I brought up an important roadblock. There are also other reasons for wearing a condom.”

  He couldn’t get the words out fast enough. “Given my family medical history, there’s no roadblock. Rugrats are cute enough when they’re someone else’s and I’m clean. I haven’t been with anyone in a year, I give blood every six months at work and I had a physical a couple of months ago. How about you?”

  She smiled. “I’m safe. I needed peace of mind after I found out Phil had cheated.”

  “Shit, he did that too?”

  The look she gave him spoke volumes. Yeah, that had been a stupid question. Still, being married to that asshole for over twenty years must have been like a form of water torture, slowly and insidiously leeching her sexuality.

  He bracketed her face with his palms and held her gaze. “Hell, I could have made it all better by simply speaking the truth. Do you want to hear it?”

  She swallowed hard before giving a barely perceptible nod. She had no way of knowing what he intended to say or do but she offered her trust.

  “You lost your virginity to an idiot and you married a jackass. You need to have sex with a man who doesn’t have shit-for-brains or a pencil dick.”

  She blinked. He waited for his words to sink in and was rewarded with a smile that lit her up from within. “I thought I just did.”

  Her smile lit him up too, like a powder keg. It was his turn to swallow hard. “I recommend more than one round. Elle, I’ve never had sex without a condom. Never even considered it. I want that so badly with you but if you need medical proof I’m clean first, I’ll slap one on.”

  Chapter Eight

  It was unspoken but they both knew that agreeing to make love with Kevin sans condom meant agreeing to try a relationship with him outside the bedroom.

  Somehow in the span of a few hours Elizabeth had met a challenge to sleep with a younger man, tried to slay all of her sexual demons with his mighty sword and leapt toward a relationship with a man who already held enough power to squeeze her heart.

  Mighty a sword as Kevin wielded, she knew her sexual demons were not all gone. Wiping out years of self-doubt with a single fuck worked well in theory but reality prevailed. It was going to take awhile to get there and until she did, her first instinct was to protect her heart.

  So was she ready to take an emotional chance with Kevin? It was a terrifying proposition. The only thing scarier was the idea of letting him go without at least trying.

  Which was, in essence, her answer.

  “How about a kiss to sway the vote?” she asked him. It was what he’d said to her the night they’d met. God, had that only been a week ago?

  The thought was cut short when his lips lowered to hers, his kiss slow and thorough, yet so carnal her arousal pulsed to life. It grew hard to stay still and her hands skimmed his back, his arms, the sides of his neck where his pulse pounded wildly.

  His kiss remained calm. Centered. Focused on what was important. Their connection.

  When he pulled back they were both breathing hard and she could feel his erection hot and heavy at her thighs. She knew with absolute clarity what she wanted.

  She slowly spread her legs.

  Kevin froze above her, making a strangled sound when the crown of his cock made contact with her pussy. Without a latex barrier, he felt hot and silky against her slit. The look on his face told her how incredible she felt to him.

  He wasn’t even inside her yet.

  She wanted that first thrust, that ultimate connection, with a desperation that bordered on insanity. When he started nibbling kisses along her jaw and shifted to continue down her body, she stopped him with a hand to his cheek.

  “Kiss me. Kiss me and come inside me,” she said.

  Lifting her head, she drew him to her mouth, slowly pressing her tongue deep as he followed her back to the pillow. He groaned against her lips, shuddering as his cock probed between her legs and penetrated that first inch.

  The heat of him was astonishing. She released his mouth with a gasp, his response more a snarl as he recaptured her lips. His tongue thrust in her mouth as he plunged hard between her legs, a searing arrow right on target.

  She exploded around him. There was no warning, no further buildup, just a giant spasm that tightened her body and crashed pleasure through her. There was nothing slow or civilized to his rhythm, or in the sounds that tore from him with each deep drive of his cock. She swallowed it all and craved more.

  She lost count of how many times she came. The orgasms had mellowed, rolling through her in gentle waves as she floated in the unique taste of his mouth, the joy of his hard, aroused body.

  She almost protested when his mouth left hers but when he groaned her name and stiffened, she let him go to watch him climax.

  Only to get slammed by the energy of it and taken right along with him.

  His eyes flew open and met hers as her name again tore from him, awe filling his gaze and his voice. Their coming together as one wasn’t a fluke, it was happening again. She watched him for as long as she could, seeing his eyes glaze, hearing his groans, feeling the energy fireball through him and burst inside her.

  Smaller bursts followed and the tendrils of heat stretched farther with each jerk of his body and responding spasm from her. It didn’t stop until long after he collapsed with a groan on top of her.

  Elizabeth stroked his damp skin, smiling with pure satisfaction when scraping her nails down his low back made him twitch and growl in p
rotest.

  “I can’t move. I’ve hit my limit,” he admitted, sounding like he’d swallowed gravel.

  “Me too,” she assured him. “But you’re a bit heavy.”

  It took him two tries to plant his forearms and lift his chest. “Better?” At her nod, he added, “Are you going to let me stay? With some rest I may be able to last longer by the tenth time or so.”

  She was horrified to feel her eyes fill with tears and she quickly closed them even as she gave him a smile she felt start at her toes. Damn, was she going to do that every time they made love? That would freak anyone out.

  “Make that a few hundred times. You have a smile that lights up a room.”

  Her gaze flew back to his and her breath caught in her throat. He was looking at her with compassion and, if she wasn’t mistaken, a sheen of moisture in his eyes too.

  “It’s okay,” he said. “I’m kinda feeling the happy relief thing myself right now.” He wiped her cheek with his thumb. “And for the record, you’re the most sensuous woman I’ve ever met.”

  Oh, that wasn’t fair! “Are you trying to make me cry?”

  He laughed and before she could protest he’d rolled them over so she was on top with him still inside her. She savored the position for a moment, the steady beat of his heart in her ear, the strong hands gently stroking her back.

  It was almost funny to think these were the nuances she’d leave out when she reported to the cougar blog. These moments were theirs and theirs alone.

  “Kevin?”

  “Mmm.”

  She could hear his struggle to remain awake but she didn’t want to think she’d given the wrong impression. “You still owe me a question. You do know we’re going to have to take this slowly, right?”

  “One day at a time, if that’s what you need.”

  “I’ve thought about it and a week will do. Let’s reassess every Friday night with the same rules. If either one wants out, tonight’s rules apply. No questions asked, no emotional outburst.”

  “Mm-hmm. Perfect. It’ll never happen. Plus it’s after midnight, so we can’t talk about it until next Friday.”